The world is a mess. We are all tired. Our shoes have holes in them and the price of a burger is now the same as a car payment. And then we see this news. Donald Trump is suing JPMorgan Chase and their boss Jamie Dimon. He wants five billion dollars. That is a five with nine zeros behind it. It is a crazy amount of money. Most people will never see one million dollars in their whole lives. These two guys are fighting over five thousand millions. It is enough to make you want to walk into the ocean and never come back.

The lawsuit names Jamie Dimon personally. He is the king of Wall Street. He is the guy who survived the 2008 crash while everyone else lost their homes. Now he is being sued by the guy who thinks he is the king of everything else. This is like a movie where two giant monsters fight in the middle of a city. But in the movies, the city gets destroyed and people care. In real life, our city is already broken. We are just standing in the rubble watching the monsters throw bags of money at each other. It is not entertaining. It is just sad.

Trump says the bank did him wrong. Maybe they did. Maybe they did not. Does it really matter to you? If you or I did something wrong at our jobs, we would be fired. If we broke the law, we would be in a small cell with a guy named Tiny. But when these guys fight, they just hire people in expensive suits to talk for them. If a bank does something wrong, they pay a fine. The fine is usually less than the money they made doing the wrong thing. It is just a cost of doing business. It is like a parking ticket for a billionaire. It does not hurt them. It just makes them annoyed for a minute.

Trump loves to sue people. It is his favorite hobby. It is what he does instead of relaxing or being a normal person. He uses the courts like a club. He hits people with it until they go away or give him what he wants. But JPMorgan is a big club too. They have more lawyers than some small countries have soldiers. This is going to be a long, boring fight that will last for years. And while they fight, they will both ask us to feel sorry for them. One side says he is being picked on by the elites. The other side says they are just following the rules. They are both lying.

Why five billion? Why not ten? Why not a trillion? The numbers do not mean anything anymore. They are just sounds they make to get the news to talk about them. It works. We are all looking at them right now. We should be looking at our own bank accounts, but those are empty. These guys want us to care about their billions like it is a game of sports. But there are no winners here for us. If Trump wins, a rich guy gets richer. If the bank wins, the rich bank keeps its gold. You still have to go to work on Monday.

The Right thinks Trump is a hero for fighting the big banks. That is funny if you think about it for more than two seconds. Trump is the guy who spent his life trying to be the ultimate elite. He lived in a gold tower. He had his name on the side of a big plane. He is not your friend. The Left thinks Jamie Dimon and the banks are the bad guys. They are right about that, but they also want those same banks to fund their own silly ideas. Everyone is a hypocrite. Everyone is looking for a way to grab a piece of the pie while the rest of us get the crumbs.

Jamie Dimon is a smart guy. He has been in charge for a very long time. He knows where all the secrets are hidden. He probably knows which closets have the skeletons. Trump thinks he can scare a guy like that? It is a bold move. It is also a very stupid move. But that is the world we live in now. Bold and stupid is the new fashion. We used to value quiet and smart. Now we value whoever can scream the loudest on the internet.

Think about what five billion dollars could actually do. It could fix the roads that are breaking our cars. It could help people who cannot afford their medicine. It could make the schools better so kids do not grow up to be as dumb as the people running the country. But it will not do any of that. It will just sit in a different bank account. It will move from one pile of gold to another pile of gold. It stays at the top. It never trickles down. That was a lie they told us forty years ago, and some people still believe it.

The whole thing is a circus. It is a show put on for the masses to keep us busy. They want us to pick a side. Are you on the side of the orange guy or the side of the bank? The real answer should be neither. We should be on the side of sanity. But sanity left the building a long time ago. Now we just have this. Two old guys fighting over a pile of money that could save a whole country, while the country watches and argues about who is less evil.

In the end, nothing will change. The lawyers will get paid millions of dollars to write papers that nobody will ever read. The news will have something to scream about for a few weeks. Trump will still be Trump. Dimon will still be the king of the money. And you will still be sitting there, wondering why your life feels like a treadmill that is going too fast. That is the real story. The rest is just noise from two people who have too much and still want more. It is exhausting. We should all just turn off the TV and go for a walk, but we probably won't. We will stay here and watch the monsters fight until the lights go out.