Let’s talk about Greenland. It’s a big, cold rock covered in ice. Nobody really cared about it for a long time unless they liked looking at snow or hanging out with polar bears. But now, the people in suits have realized there is money under that ice. There are rare earth minerals, oil, and gas buried down there. And you know the rule of the world: if there is stuff to steal from the earth, the big countries will fight over it like dogs over a bone.

But there is a funny problem. A really funny problem. The United States of America, the so-called greatest superpower in history, can’t get to the loot. We can’t get there because we forgot how to build the boats.

According to the news, icebreakers are the key technology to "unlock" Greenland. That is a fancy way of saying we need big, heavy ships to smash through the frozen ocean so we can start drilling. But here is the punchline: the United States doesn't really have any. We have a couple of old, rusty buckets that break down half the time. Meanwhile, Russia has a massive fleet. They have nuclear-powered monsters that slice through ice like it is butter. Even China is building them, and they don't even live near the Arctic.

So, the news tells us that these ships are only made by "US allies or adversaries." That is a nice way of saying "literally everyone except us." We have to go hat-in-hand to countries like Finland and ask them to build us a boat. It is embarrassing. It is pathetic. We spend almost a trillion dollars a year on the military. We build jets that cost more than small countries. We build aircraft carriers that are basically floating cities. But we can’t build a ship with a thick nose to hit some ice?

This is what happens when a country stops making things and starts just moving money around. We don't have the shipyards anymore. We don't have the know-how. The "Make in America" crowd loves to wear the hats, but they aren't welding the steel. The experts say it will take years to catch up. By the time we build a decent icebreaker, the Russians will probably have built a shopping mall on the North Pole.

It is deeply funny to watch the politicians panic about this. They want to be tough. They want to project power. But power isn't just speeches and tweets. Power is logistics. Power is being able to go where you want to go. Right now, the United States is like a rich guy with a Ferrari who is stuck in a snowbank because he bought summer tires. He looks good, but he isn't going anywhere.

We are stuck relying on our "allies." That sounds nice. It sounds like teamwork. But in the real world, it means we are dependent. If Finland decides they are busy, we stay home. If the Canadians don't want to help, we stay home. A superpower that has to ask for a ride is not a superpower. It is a passenger.

And let's look at the "adversaries" part. The scary enemies. Russia and China. They aren't waiting. They saw the ice melting and they made a plan. They invested in the boring, heavy, industrial stuff that actually matters. The West was too busy inventing new apps to deliver cold coffee to our doors. We were too busy creating financial instruments that don't exist. The bad guys were pouring steel. Now they control the northern ocean.

The irony is thick. We want Greenland so bad. Remember when Trump tried to buy it? Everyone laughed, but the greed was real. The current administration wants it just as bad; they are just more polite about it. They all want the minerals. They want the strategic position. But wanting something doesn't matter if you can't reach it.

So what is the American solution? It probably won't be building ships. That is too hard. That takes work. The American solution will probably be to just wait for the planet to get hotter. If we keep polluting the air, the ice will melt on its own. Then we won't need icebreakers. We can just sail our normal, flimsy boats right up to the shore and start drilling. It is the lazy way out. It is the destructive way out. And it is exactly what we deserve.

Until then, we are just standing on the dock, freezing, watching the Russians sail by. The key to unlocking Greenland isn't just technology. It is competence. And right now, we are fresh out of that.