You are never going to believe this. I hope you are sitting down. If you are drinking coffee, put it down before you spill it all over yourself from the sheer shock. **Kim Jong Un**, the supreme leader of **North Korea**, has been picked to keep running the hermit kingdom.

I know. It is wild. Who could have seen this coming? It is the biggest surprise since the sun came up this morning. It is as shocking as water being wet.

The news wires are buzzing with the latest **North Korea news**. They are saying he was “re-appointed” as the leader of the **ruling party**. They use words like “election” and “vote.” It makes me want to bang my head against a wall. Let’s call it what it really is. This wasn’t an election. This was a room full of terrified men in bad suits clapping until their hands bled because they like being alive.

Here is how this works. The **Workers' Party Congress** meets. This is a big fancy meeting that happens every few years. Thousands of people gather in a giant hall in Pyongyang. They sit in perfect rows. They wear the same dark clothes. They look like stiff cardboard cutouts. Then, the name “Kim Jong Un” is read out loud.

And then the clapping starts. They clap. And they clap. And they scream “Hurray!” They do this because if you are the first guy to stop clapping, you might not go home that night. It is a survival game. It is musical chairs, but the loser goes to a labor camp. So, naturally, he won the vote. He got 100 percent of the vote. Of course he did. In a place where voting “no” gets you erased, “yes” is the only word in the dictionary.

The media treats this like actual news, dissecting his shift to **General Secretary** of the party. He used to be Chairman. Now he is General Secretary. Or maybe it is the other way around. Who cares? It does not matter what title he gives himself. He could call himself the Grand Wizard of Cheese and he would still be the dictator with the nukes. The title is just a sticker he puts on his chest so he feels important.

This family has been doing this since the 1940s. That is a long time. Grandpa Kim started it. Daddy Kim kept it going. Now Baby Kim is running the show. It is a family business. But instead of selling shoes or fixing cars, their family business is owning millions of people and threatening to blow up the world.

We look at this from the outside and we laugh. We think it is funny. We make jokes about his hair or his weight. But it really isn’t funny. It is pathetic. It is a whole country held hostage by one family’s ego. And the worst part? The rest of the world plays along with the game.

Politicians in the West act surprised. They hold meetings. They write strongly worded letters regarding **diplomacy** and sanctions. The Left talks about engagement. They think if we just talk nicely to the guy with the gun, maybe he will put it down. They are dreaming. The Right talks about “toughness” and “sanctions.” They think if we starve the people enough, the leader will give up. That is also stupid. He eats fine. The people starve, but he doesn't care.

Both sides are useless. They are just reacting to a script that was written eighty years ago. Nothing changes. The Kims stay in power. The rockets get bigger. The people get thinner. And every few years, we get a headline saying, “Kim Wins Again!”

Let’s be honest about power for a second. We like to think we are so much better. We have democracy. We have choices. Do we? Sure, we get to pick between two rich guys who don't care about us. They get to pick one rich guy who doesn't care about them. Our chains are a little looser, and we have better internet, but don’t kid yourself. The people at the top always stay at the top.

In North Korea, they just stopped pretending. They don’t run ads. They don’t kiss babies. They don’t pretend to care about your opinion. They just tell you who the boss is. In a weird, twisted way, it is almost more honest than what we do. At least they know exactly where they stand. They are under the boot. We are under the boot too, but we are busy arguing about what color the boot should be.

So, **Kim Jong Un** is the leader again. He has “strengthened his grip.” As if his grip could get any tighter. If he squeezed any harder, the whole country would pop. This “election” is just a show. It is a play put on for an audience of one. He claps for himself, and the world watches, bored and helpless.

Don’t expect anything to change. Not today. Not tomorrow. We will be reading this same story in ten years. Maybe twenty. Unless the people there decide they are done clapping. But looking at those pictures, looking at that fear in their eyes, I wouldn’t bet on it. The show goes on.

***

### References & Fact-Check * **Primary Source:** [Kim Jong Un re-appointed leader of North Korea's ruling party](https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cvg18588mdko?at_medium=RSS&at_campaign=rss) (BBC News). * **Context:** The Workers' Party of Korea holds periodic congresses to solidify leadership titles, recently reinstating the title of General Secretary for Kim Jong Un.