Behold the majesty of the American Empire: a flying fossil, a gilded tube of 1980s technology, failing to ferry its orange cargo to a mountain retreat for the terminally self-important. We are told that Air Force One, that airborne sanctuary of the leader of the free world, had to limp back to the United States shortly after takeoff due to an 'electrical issue.' It’s almost too perfect. In a country currently vibrating with the tension of a thousand fraying nerves, the very vehicle meant to project power across the Atlantic couldn't even manage to sustain a steady current. If there were a god with a sense of irony, this would be his magnum opus. The president’s trip to the World Economic Forum in Davos has been delayed, and the world is forced to wait a few more hours for the inevitable collision of populist rhetoric and billionaire back-slapping.

Davos, for the uninitiated or the blissfully ignorant, is the annual pilgrimage where the world’s most successful parasites gather to discuss 'sustainability' while eating wagyu beef flown in on private jets. It is a festival of cognitive dissonance. Trump’s presence there is usually the main event—a collision between the old-school greed of the Manhattan skyline and the new-age pretension of the European technocracy. But this year, the lights went out. Not in the room, but in the plane. An 'electrical issue.' It’s the kind of vague, bureaucratic phrasing that hides a multitude of sins. Was it a frayed wire? A blown fuse? Or perhaps the plane itself, a Boeing 747-200B that has been in service since the Cold War, simply realized it didn't want to go? I can't say I blame the hardware. If I were an aging piece of aerospace engineering tasked with hauling that much ego over the ocean, I’d short-circuit too. It is an act of mechanical self-preservation that we should all envy.

The reaction to this trivial mechanical failure is, as expected, a masterclass in modern stupidity. On the Left, the blue-checked hordes of social media are already salivating, treating a faulty wire like a divine omen or a sign that the universe itself is resisting the administration. They talk about 'the resistance' as if the aircraft’s alternator joined a local activist chapter. It’s pathetic. It’s a plane, you morons. Things break. Especially things that are older than the internet. On the Right, the paranoia is even more delicious. Give it twenty minutes and the conspiracists will be claiming the 'Deep State' snuck onto the tarmac with a pair of wire cutters to prevent the Great Disruptor from exposing the globalist cabal. Because, of course, the best way to stop a world leader is to make his plane turn around and land safely back at home for a few hours. High-stakes espionage has really gone downhill since the seventies.

The reality, which is far more depressing, is that we are governed by a crumbling infrastructure that matches our crumbling intellects. Air Force One is a metaphor with wings. It looks shiny and impressive from a distance, painted in those iconic shades of blue and white, but underneath the hood, it’s a mess of outdated systems and components held together by the sheer willpower of the maintenance crews. It is a flying museum. The fact that it failed is the most honest thing that has happened in Washington in years. It is a literal short circuit in the halls of power. We are a nation that can’t keep its own presidential transport in the air, yet we still think we can dictate the terms of global trade to a room full of Swiss bankers and German industrialists.

And let’s talk about the destination. Davos. The very word sounds like a brand of expensive, flavorless water. These people—the CEOs, the world leaders, the celebrities who think 'humanitarian' is a personality trait—are currently congregating in the Alps to solve problems they themselves created. They are the firefighters who also happen to be the primary manufacturers of gasoline. Trump’s delay doesn't matter because the outcome of Davos is always the same: a series of vague manifestos, some networking between people who already own everything, and a collective agreement to do nothing while pretending to do everything. The electrical issue on Air Force One is a mercy. Every hour that plane stays on the ground is an hour the world is spared another redundant speech about 'the future of capitalism' or 'the Fourth Industrial Revolution.'

There is something deeply satisfying about the sheer mundanity of this failure. We live in an era of 'unprecedented' everything—unprecedented scandals, unprecedented tweets, unprecedented division. And yet, the thing that actually stops the gears of history for a moment is a faulty circuit. It’s a reminder that no matter how much we inflate our own importance, we are still beholden to the laws of physics and the quality of our maintenance. The Tangerine Titan can rail against the world, his enemies can plot his downfall, and the elite can prepare their champagne flutes in the snow, but if the copper wiring says 'no,' then everybody stays home. The universe doesn't care about your agenda; it only cares about the flow of electrons. As the plane returned to the U.S. shortly after takeoff on Tuesday evening, it delivered a silent, sparking verdict on our collective competence. We are all just passengers on a flight to nowhere, waiting for the lights to flicker out.