SYDNEY—Calling the emergency measure a “gross violation of personal liberties” and “political correctness gone mad,” thousands of furious Sydneysiders marched on City Hall today to protest the closure of dozens of local beaches following four recent shark attacks within 48 hours. “This is the nanny state at its worst,” said 43-year-old surfer Kyle “Dingo” Henderson, standing before a barricaded entrance to Bondi Beach while gesturing wildly toward the ocean, where a 12-foot Great White was clearly visible breaching the surface with a boogie board in its jaws. “Just because three blokes got a little bit nibbled, the government thinks they can tell me I’m not allowed to wade into an active feeding frenzy? It’s un-Australian. If I want to donate my left calf to the marine ecosystem before breakfast, that is my choice as a taxpayer.” At press time, local authorities were forced to deploy riot police after protesters began cutting through the caution tape to defiantly dangle their limbs off the pier.