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The Global Hospice: Watching the Rich World Spend Its Way into a Gold-Plated Grave

Buck Valor
Written by
Buck ValorPersiflating Non-Journalist
Sunday, June 29, 2025
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A surreal oil painting of a lavish banquet set on a sinking marble platform in the middle of a dark, turbulent ocean. High-ranking politicians from various nations, wearing expensive suits and sashes, are frantically stuffing $100 bills into their mouths instead of food. In the background, a giant, glowing red digital clock showing a trillions-of-dollars debt counter is cracking and melting into the sea. The style is dark, satirical, and hyper-detailed, reminiscent of a modern Goya.

Behold the 'Rich World,' a term that has become increasingly synonymous with 'Advanced Palliative Care.' It seems the masters of the universe—those suit-wearing parasites inhabiting the halls of power from Washington to Westminster—have collectively decided that the laws of mathematics are merely suggestions, much like ethics or speed limits. The latest fashion in governance isn't policy, vision, or even basic competence; it is the 'Big, Beautiful Budget,' a fiscal suicide note written in neon ink. Across the developed world, governments have abandoned even the pretense of restraint, opting instead to splash cash with the frantic desperation of a gambler who knows the casino is about to be hit by a meteor.

For decades, we were subjected to the tedious theater of 'fiscal responsibility.' The Right would pretend to care about the deficit while quietly shoveling billions into the maws of defense contractors and fossil fuel ghouls. The Left would counter with grand plans for social engineering, funded by the magical money tree that they swear is just around the corner, provided we tax 'the rich'—a group that, conveniently, includes none of the people actually writing the tax laws. But now, the mask has slipped entirely. No one is even pretending to care about the bill anymore. They’ve realized that if you spend enough of someone else's money, you can buy off a significant portion of the electorate before the inflation-induced heart attack sets in.

The United States, as always, leads the charge in this race to the bottom. With a national debt that looks like a high score on an arcade game no one knows how to play, the American political class has embraced a philosophy of infinite credit. On one side, you have the MAGA-fied Right, whose idea of a balanced budget is a tax cut for billionaires and a military budget that could fund a galactic empire. On the other, you have the performative Left, who view every minor societal inconvenience as a reason to dump another trillion dollars into a bureaucratic incinerator. It’s a bipartisan pact of mutual destruction, and the only thing they agree on is that the printing press must never, ever stop. They are two hands on the same shovel, digging a hole so deep that the light of economic reality can no longer reach the bottom.

But don't let the Americans take all the credit for this insanity. The 'rich world' at large is following suit with the mindless devotion of lemmings in tailored suits. In Europe, the situation is even more pathetic. Countries with stagnant growth and aging populations are splashing cash they don't have to maintain the illusion of a 20th-century welfare state in a 21st-century graveyard. The UK, a damp island currently cosplaying as a relevant global power, is wrestling with its own fiscal incontinence, proving that you don't need a superpower's ego to have a superpower's debt. The EU’s fiscal rules have become a joke, ignored by anyone with enough political capital to tell Brussels to kick rocks. It is a continent-wide hallucination where everyone believes they can retire at fifty on a pension funded by a youth population that doesn't exist and a treasury that is empty.

Why is this happening? Because the modern politician is a creature of the immediate. They don't look at the horizon; they look at the next polling cycle. Why bother with the difficult, soul-crushing work of structural reform when you can just borrow another few billion to subsidize a failing industry or buy a few thousand votes with a temporary handout? We are living in the age of the 'Great Handout,' where the only thing being manufactured in the West is debt and excuses. The political class has realized that the public has the memory of a goldfish and the appetite of a tapeworm. As long as the checks clear today, nobody cares if the bank burns down tomorrow.

The economists—those high priests of a religion that has never accurately predicted a single apocalypse—sit in their ivory towers and babble about 'debt-to-GDP ratios' as if those numbers still mean anything. They talk about 'soft landings' while the plane is currently on fire and the pilots are arguing over who gets the last bag of peanuts. The reality is that we are witnessing the terminal phase of the post-war economic order. We have built a civilization on the assumption that tomorrow will always be richer than today, and we are now desperately trying to maintain that lie by cannibalizing the future. It isn't just an American problem; it's a symptom of a global civilization that has decided it would rather burn the house down for warmth than put on a sweater.

It’s a beautiful spectacle, in a morbid, watching-a-train-wreck-in-slow-motion kind of way. The Right will continue to bark about 'small government' while bloating the police state and corporate subsidies. The Left will continue to preach 'equity' while ensuring that the only thing truly equal is the worthlessness of the currency in everyone's pockets. And the rest of us? We get to sit back and watch as the 'Rich World' spends its way into a dignified, gold-plated oblivion. Don't worry about the bill; your grandchildren won't be able to pay it anyway. They'll be too busy fighting over the last scraps of a world we spent into extinction.

This story is an interpreted work of social commentary based on real events. Source: The Economist

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