There is a special kind of exhaustion that comes from watching world leaders gather in the snow. They fly to Davos, Switzerland, a tiny ski town for the super-rich, to talk about how to save the world while wearing suits that cost more than most people’s cars. It is theater. It is a show. And this week, the star of the show was Donald Trump, bringing his own unique brand of chaos to the Swiss Alps.

After spending a good amount of time yelling at Europe—the very place he was visiting—about how unfair they are to him, the President decided to declare a victory. Not a victory over poverty, or war, or the fact that the planet is getting warmer. No, he declared a victory regarding Greenland. Yes, that giant island covered in ice that he tried to buy last year like it was a distressed hotel property in Atlantic City.

Let us pause and really think about this. A few months ago, the President of the United States looked at a sovereign territory, a place where people live, work, and have their own government, and asked, "How much?" When Denmark, the country that handles Greenland’s foreign affairs, politely said, "It is not for sale," Trump got angry. He cancelled a trip. He called the Danish Prime Minister "nasty." It was the diplomatic equivalent of a child flipping the Monopoly board because someone else owns Boardwalk.

But now, the script has flipped. In Davos, amidst the billionaires and the expensive hot chocolate, Trump announced that he has "won" an agreement. The details, of course, are classic political smoke and mirrors. He isn't buying the island. He isn't putting a gold tower on the ice sheet. The big victory is essentially opening a consulate—a small diplomatic office—and sending a bit of money for development. In the real world, this is boring paperwork. It happens all the time. Countries open offices in other places every day without fanfare.

In Trump’s world, however, boring paperwork is transformed into a conquest. He needs to show that he is the ultimate dealmaker, even when no deal was actually made. He took a standard diplomatic move and dressed it up as if he had just acquired a new territory for the empire. It is fascinating to watch how he creates a reality distortion field. He creates a fight where there wasn't one (trying to buy a country), gets rejected, and then claims the consolation prize is actually the grand trophy he wanted all along.

The irony of doing this in Europe is rich. During his speech at Davos, he spent a lot of time complaining about European countries. He thinks they are mean to him on trade. He thinks they don't pay enough for their own defense. He treats his oldest allies like tenants who are late on the rent. And yet, he is desperate for their real estate. He scolds them with one breath and tries to claim their land with the next.

This whole Greenland saga perfectly captures the absurdity of modern politics. We have serious problems to solve. The Arctic is melting. Global economies are shaky. People are worried about the future. And what is the most powerful man in the world focused on? He is focused on a real estate fantasy. He treats international relations like a property development meeting. He looks at a map, sees a big white space, and thinks, "I should own that."

It reveals a deep misunderstanding of how the world works today. You cannot simply trade territories like baseball cards. People live there. They have a say. But for a man who sees everything as a transaction, the idea of "self-determination" is just an annoying obstacle to closing the deal. To him, everything has a price tag. If you can't buy the whole thing, you buy a small piece and call it a win.

So, here we are. The President leaves Davos claiming he fixed the Greenland situation. The Europeans roll their eyes so hard it probably hurts. The people of Greenland go on with their lives, likely wondering why they are suddenly the main characters in an American reality TV show. And the rest of us are left watching this spectacle, wondering when politics became so incredibly stupid.

He didn't buy the island. He opened an office. But in the history book he is writing in his own head, he probably just conquered the North. And the saddest part is, he expects us to applaud the performance.